Sunday, September 23, 2007

How to...
Fix the zipper on your school uniform skirt.
Or perhaps, how not to fix it...


Well, the thing is,I broke the little thing connected to the zipper on Friday. You know, the thing that you pull so the zipper "unzips" *inserts dirty thoughts here*. For our sake, we shall call it a "zipper puller". As a result, I can't pull the zipper up, or down, for that matter.


So, I've been trying to fix it since Friday and here are a list of all the things I attempted:


1) Trying to replace the "zipper puller" with "a piece of string", if you can call it that.
Alas, I always made the loop too small for my fat fingers to fit through. And eventually, I ran outta string. Yep, there is officially no more string in the Wrong household....uh, I mean..Wong household.


2) Trying to fit a safety pin through the hole.
Of course, that didn't work either. Although, now my skirt has a nice red colour to it, as I did prick my fingers far too many times during the process. Never fear, I shall make red splotches on blue tartan fashionable once more!


3) Attempting to pull the zipper down with my teeth.
Do not try this at home. Honestly. It's worst than eating 10 packets of starburst lollies. However, if like me, you're comfortable with 4 cavities, an ulcer on your tongue and a broken front tooth, be my guest.


4) Run to mummy.
After my failed attempts at independence, one has to ultimately admit defeat. Although I must admit, my mum is as talented in the field of fixing things as I am, having no experience whatsoever with a sewing kit. Although, I've got to give it to her. SHE actually managed to shove that safety pin through that excruciatingly tiny hole.


Well, that is the end of my banter. Guys, prepare to see me at school tomorrow looking like a ten-year-old bogan (with my new haircut and all), complete with a safety pin as a zipper.


Oh yeah, and remind me to buy a new skirt on Wednesday.


Posted by... Ky, the 10 year old bogan.

Memories of a past <3


SMILE =)


















Friday, September 21, 2007

Hearts flowers.

I like you guys =)

Thankyou for being uberly awesome all the time <3

Marie is off to china in a day or so O_O;

have a lovely last week of YEAR 11 without me yes?

i`ll be with you guys in spirit <3

hopefully i'll have access to some kind of messaging medium so i'll talk to you then..

i think i'll be back on the 5th so there's plenty more holidays to see you guys =)

<3

Monday, September 17, 2007

How To…
Save the World



1) Trees are an extremely valuable and rare resource.
At the moment, I would have to walk about five metres to be of oxygen receiving radius from a tree. This already far exceeds my recommended daily dosage of exercise. Imagine having to walk ten metres to be close to a tree…
Some tips on saving trees are:
i)
Plant more trees.
An obvious step to take to prevent global warming, or even suffocation in the near future. More trees, less Bush!
ii) Use less paper. Or more importantly, toilet paper.
Toilet paper has to be the most common form of paper used in today’s society. Besides from its most obvious function, toilet paper can be used as tissue paper, makeup removing agent, scrap paper (for writing down phone numbers, and working out maths problems), outfit for a Halloween party, bikini, and the list goes on. Less usage of toilet paper would significantly reduce wastage of our precious green resource.
iii) Chain yourself to a tree in a tropical rainforest. In a remote area.
This will surely discourage deforestation. However, disadvantages include being eaten alive by cannibalistic natives and the possibility that no one will even realise that you have disappeared from your home for ten days. Needless to say, this is not recommended for nigels with no friends or family who care about them.
iv) Buy items made from recycled paper.
There are a variety of things that are made from recycled paper. Examples include toilet paper, writing paper, tissue paper, and bikinis. Albeit, I would think twice about writing a love letter on recycled paper, as you might not know whether you’ve been writing on the remains of someone else’s dinner.


2) Water is an extremely valuable and rare resource.
It’s true that I’m still up to my knees with rainwater from the June/July rain marathon. But I’m pretty sure it won’t last especially since old Johnnie Howard’s eyebrows are sponging us dry at this very moment.
Some tips on saving water are:
i)Limit drinking of water. From 6-8 glasses a day to 1-2 glasses.
Personally, I go one step further and limit myself to two popper boxes a day. It may be bad for our health in the short run but you would have to look at it logically….. I will get back to you on that when I think of something.
ii)Reduce flushing of toilet
Abide by this widely used aphorism:”If it’s yellow, let it mellow. When it’s brown, flush it down.”

iii) Limit shower time. To the recommended time of 4 minutes ± 1 second.
However, this may lead to embarrassing consequences. I have a cousin who came out of the shower while in the middle of shampooing his hair. While out and about with his friends, it started to rain, and his hair started emanating bubbles. As a result, he was greatly humiliated and never shampooed his hair ever again. The best solution to this dilemma is to not take any showers at all.


3) Humans are an extremely rare and valuable resource.
Especially me.
Some tips on saving me include:
i) Buying me food.
ii) Buying me more food.
iii) Uh, you get the picture. I’m a glutton.


Posted by Ky ... the Environmental Crusader