How to …
CELEBRATE OUR FIRST B’DAY!

HAPPY FUCKIN’ B’DAY MAN !

And now, on to my flow of consciousness…

Wow I can’t believe this blog has lasted a year! As a special treat, I have decided to force everyone to blog. Oh, and we’re holding a blog party! And everyone’s invited! That is, if anyone decides to turn up!

I should really stop my copious usage of exclamation marks. But I just couldn’t help it. They were the only punctuation that can effectively express my excitement.

Well since it’s our birthday. I thought I would reflect on our past achievements and how we came into being, not unlike what Chloe has just done. Chloe just deleted a whole chunk of her blog however, because apparently, she was accused of being fictitious and fabricating the humble beginnings of our blog. Well let me just remind you that we have spent almost a term studying “History and Memory”. Is memory not suceptible to fallibility? Does it not have the inclination to be distorted according to the individual’s emotions? In any case, it has been deleted, and we shall never read that interesting work of fiction again. R.I.P.

Anyway back to the subject of our blog party, I have absolutely no idea of what it entails. So basically I’m just going to force a whole bunch of people on to the blog at midnight. Sounds like fun? You bet it is. No I’m not trying to answer my own rhetorical questions. No I’m not trying to dictate your thoughts. Although, now that I think about it, my inert, life long dream has always been to control the world. That’s right. Like how Stalin controlled Russia. But the real irony really lies in the fact that I am the one being controlled. That’s right. Manipulated by our education system. My mind is being brainlessly moulded by the indoctrination from teachers and tutors alike. Note the multiple references to “Brave New World” throughout this paragraph.

Ah it seems that I have steered away from the topic yet again. What was the topic anyway? Oh yeah. Happy B’day Blog. Humble beginnings, humble beginnings …
Well if I remember correctly, I started posting my “How to’s ..” on the Sydney Boy’s Moogle at first. And if I remember correctly, I had a total of 0 readers. So I moved here, and my number of readers improved, if only just slightly. It went from 0 to 2. Give or take a few. Anyway, if you’re curious, head back to March last year, or maybe April when I wrote about “How to … Eat an Elephant”.

The past. How long ago was the past? Well reading my past entries, I cringe but not that much. However, just a few minutes ago I received an email, from none other than XANGA.COM ( I thoroughly apologise to blogger.com for advertising another blogging site). Remember our innocent by nevertheless extremely GAY year 8 blogs Marie? I didn’t. And I can’t believe I went back to look at them. Now, I can’t honestly say, “Ew. Why are the juniors so lame? I was never as lame as they are when I was a junior.” Because that is absolutely. Untrue.

Now I just hope that 3 years from now, I won’t be looking back at this “bull blog”, cringe, and develop a hemorrhoid in my brain.

Oh yeah, when I realised it was our birthday soon, I proposed to Marie that we try and get 6000 visitors by our birthday, since our blog is so very popular *cough*. However, realistically that wasn’t going to happen. So we settled for 5300. AND GUESS WHAT? KY WAS THE 5300th visitor. *Fills with pride* And here’s proof:

So basically, I’ve spent the past … more than a few … minutes of my life, writing about useless, brainless shit. What you have read above has not increased your intelligence, it might have even reduced it, but I hope that you have wasted your time effectively.

In the spirit of celebration, I shall colour this post in the colours of the rainbows. Hopefully, none of the readers get seizures.

To end on a happy note, I will leave you with the only piece of Latin I know:
“Sextus Pinas Erectus”


… which means “Six tall pine trees”

Posted by Ky, who’s not “erectus”.
Shit that sounds so wrong.
Okay let me try again …
Posted by Ky, who’s vertically challenged.
Ew, that just makes me sound like Bernard Marx.
Okay last try …

Posted by Ky, just Ky.

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Sorry Bec, I just had to own you for once =)

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